Bush’s love of deregulation and zero oversight were the blueprint for massive financial losses, two expensive wars, and driving the U.S. economy into the ground.
Those glasses say it all so succintly. We can’t see past ourselves. If I were to tell someone that America has an ego problem, people look at me weird. “An ego problem? But we are the greatest country in the world.”
So I made this for an online contest but missed the deadline…so I’m putting it here!
“The campaigns that politicians wish they could run”
(I made this today)
Reason #114 - An episode of a reality-TV show about an obese redneck family that farts a lot had higher cable ratings than the live telecast of the Republican National Convention.
(Actually, this may be a reason America does not suck. We will update you as this story develops)
Let’s see, compared to the USA, Canada has
- universal healthcare
- legalized marijuana
- marriage equality
- one of the best public education systems in the world
- no legal restrictions on abortion
- less gun deaths
- less defense spending which means more money for maple syrup distribution
- no global reputation of starting wars without reason (or with stupid reasons like our oil somehow ending up under a rival country’s land)
- lower levels of poverty, hate crimes, hunger, pollution, and myriad other issues the US faces
But it’s not all kittens and rainbows for our neighbors to the North. Canada isn’t without its issues, for example
- higher frequency of moose attacks
- constant threat of rabid geese
- hockey injuries
- Justin Beiber
So I’d say it’s pretty well split.
Reason #337 - Because if a woman is raped and impregnated and wants to terminate her pregnancy, she should really just trust this guy because he “hears things from doctors.”
Reason #338 - Because it’s common scientific knowledge that rapist sperm only reaches the victim’s egg if she’s being raped illegitimately.
Reason #339 - Because, despite the hard work of men like Missouri Senate candidate Todd Akin (R), women still don’t realize that those who know how women’s body’s work best are white Republican male politicians.
Reason #317 - One in five Americans can’t find their own country on a map. Clearly it’s because we don’t have maps, according to South Carolina’s #1 professional bikini-wearer.
Reason #781 - Because American news media knows what is really important for Americans to know about. And that’s important thing is one arbitrary millionaire family, not some stupid acidification of the dumb oceans that could kill us all.
They make an easily mockable scapegoat for Americans to use to deflect from their own shitty country.
Reason #394 - Because not only do Americans eat the most food, but we pride ourselves on inventing and consuming the grossest food in human history!
Reason #730 - That a 5-college transfer student, 3rd-runner-up beauty queen and failed one term Alaskan governor could rise high enough in American politics to be just a 72-year-old’s heartbeat away from becoming Commander in Chief, the ultimate evidence of the American dream.